Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Organizing My Whole Life

Day 20 of my second month of this Happiness project and I feel the weight on my shoulders.  It has been a roller coaster of a month and I do not feel I have gotten enough done.  But here is where I am at...

I did organize the closet in my spare room in the basement.  It is where all our games and kids toys have gone.  I pulled everything out and with some small bins and tape I got the games and toys organized.  I wish I had taken a before picture!!  It was a crazy mess.  But here is the after picture:

It goes back quite a ways but here is the front part.  The floor below is completely empty and I really don't know what to put back in there.  I have a pretty good storage room so I don't need the extra storage, atleast not in the basement.  I could definitely use a linen closet upstairs (this house did not have ANY linen closets built in it).  Any ways, I was very happy to complete this.  Now if you could see behind me you would probably laugh!  It is a disaster area.  That will be the next area I will attack.  I will take a before and after picture this time!

So this is pretty much the best that I've done.  I have gone through my closet again and got rid of another bag of clothes.  I also went through all the families coats and I will be donating about 10 coats.  I look at all those coats and realize how blessed I am to have all that I do.  What a great life God has given me.

I am working on improving my personal life this month as well.  It has been an emotional roller coaster this month.  My marriage is on the rocks and most likely ending.  It has been hard to come to this conclusion but I now know it is the best for both our futures.  We are both on different paths in life and no longer compliment each other.  Of course that is not the reason for our divorce, but this is basically what it boils down to.  I am focusing more on my relationship with God and my children.  I have come to a realization that my idea of God and religion has been a facade my whole life.  I do believe in God... but not the one I have been taught about.  I feel my eyes have been opened... like I had been walking around with my eyes closed for the past 35 years!  I'm not going to go too deep into this life change as well.  Maybe later on as I get more information and really jump into this new life of mine.  Here is my new life theme song...

For once I feel like I am living authentically and in line with how God truly wants me to be.  It is definitely hard to make these changes in my life and I have to continuously remind myself why I am doing this and why it is so important.  I'm sure I will criticized for my choices especially in the area where I live, but I would rather be judged by others than continue to live a lie.  I have never felt so sure about anything in my life.  Although I feel like I am in a mourning process, I am willing to go through it to get to a better life.  A more enriching and fulfilling life is waiting just around the corner!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Beginning of Month 2 - Organization

So... this past month was a challenge, but I made it through and I really think I did a great job.  I didn't have even one sip of soda and I ate very little refined sugars or processed foods.  Towards the end of the month I was a little more lenient on the sugars and foods, but I kept it down to a minimum and I'm proud of myself.  I really don't want to go back to the way I was eating before February.  I'm not saying I won't have treats or sweets or even pastas and breads... but I will definitely keep my rations smaller and enjoy to the fullest when I do eat them. 

My past month has been challenging for many reasons besides the lack of sugar in my diet!  I have been having some major family problems and I have been struggling to focus and keep myself on this new path of mine.  It has been rough and it is definitely not over yet, but I know when I get to the other end of this trial I will be stronger and better prepared for all life can offer me. 

I have read this quote several times over this past week and it has helped me realize how much I have allowed myself to be stifled and lost into the roles society expects from me.  I have ignored my gift of intuition and forgotten who I am.  I am a beautiful, inspiring, powerful, loving woman of light and I choose from this day on to remember this.  I'm not going to allow anyone to sway me from what I feel is right for me and I not going to question my God given gift of intuition.  This has been a hard road these past few months, but from here on out I am powerful and I am strong and I will make it through these hard times.  I will continue to feel joy in the things that matter most and get rid of the things in my life that cause me unhappiness. 

The month of March I said I would focus on organization and that is still the plan.  I did a few things in February to prepare for this and I am looking forward to cleaning, organizing and recycling.  This also pertains to my life emotional and spiritually.  I am ready for a change and I know with God's assistance and presence in my life I will have the strength and courage to do anything I put my mind to.

I will keep updating this blog as much as possible and I am looking forward to seeing the positive changes that will occur in my life as I live it to the fullest and continue to remember who I am!